the scum thickens...

My house almost exploded. Our water pump died and had to be repaired yesterday, letting us have time to truly miss having water. All it takes is about an hour, less if you actually like hygiene. So after spending 18 hours without water, we went somewhat insane. Seriously, it got so bad that Mom actually ended up spending ten dalla to get bottled water. The only reason I came out relatively unscathed were because of 2 traits:

1) I'm gross

2) My fathers many road trips has taught me hold "hold it" for a long, long time...

Still, we got that and the dryer fixed, so life should be good. But then I had to clean the bathroom. You know the garbage thing on the Death Star in the 1rst Star Wars movie? Add a sink and a crapper and you have our bathroom clearly pictured. It was gross! And I had to clean it. :(

The sink area was all I had to do personally, but that was enough. After I scraped out all the sludge, I found the sink to be twice as large as it used to be and that it DID have a drain. Still, at least I won't have to clean it for another year.

1rst Post in MONTHS!!!!!

Well, where to begin?

There have been several changes in my life since February, the most profound being my father not being here. He is overseas teaching native how to run a jail without torturing people, and the next time I see him will be during winter in the Caribbean. (I wanted the vacation to be in Ireland, bobsagit!) Still, it's weird not having to check constantly to see if you're about to be pounced upon, doing something stupid and not hearing a sarcastic comment, not having to check to see if my airsoft rifle is missing, no wrestling in the kitchen... and I'm now realizing just how weird it is that I actually miss this stuff.

I'm taking summer classes, because apparently I mentally double the point value of large projects, and thus my many one-legged A's. I have found a few friends here, who shall be dubbed Muse Brain, Tech Man, and Brace. Brace has messed up her wrist somehow, and is quiet, friendly, has a knowledge of vintage weaponry, and is well versed in history. wait a minute... I described what I was like BD! (Before Drama) Strange, yet really smegging awesome! Tech Man is a computer wizard. He created face recognition software on his own. Sadly, the police confiscated it because he attached it to a remote control paintball gun. He's one of those people who could probably make a radio out of a microwave, and a gamer to boot! Finally we come to Muse Brain, a super-talkative passionate Christian who love to create and play music. She's had a recent falling out with her parents over her now EX-boyfriend because he was Catholic. The guy broke up with her over email because of it. (shame!!!! he should have at least done it over the phone!!) Still, she doesn't let it interfere with her happy-go-lucky-ness.

And the last major update: Kat! Kat is a cat that I mistook for Huntress (another cat) and captured. We brought her in, took care of her, got her to the vet, and is now a part of the family. She is a tuxedo kitty, schizophrenic, and chirrups frequently. I take that as a sign of politeness. Still, one cannot avoid the fact she is schizo! She chases imaginary birds, is convinced the rugs are out to get her, mistakes people for bears (including me. she sliced my hand open once...), and is addicted to people food. She's friendly, but insane!

Oh, well. At least we don't need to stick her in a little kitty straitjacket.

AT SMEGGING LAST!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally, a day where my parents do not need the net more then me AND the Smart One can survive five minutes without fanfic.

What you missed in a matchbox: my father is applying for a job over seas to teach the natives how to run a jail, causing house-wide stress. I haven't seen Cheese in a week, and I founded a camera del vidio that I'm trying to make work good. (my english speaking good, no?)

I really don't have anything to write about, so time for my special PARANOIA XP weapons. Home brewed, too. (all but the sniper are experimental.)

Weapon type dmg MBM Shots Range Cost Clearance

Shrapgun Porject Impct W3K 5 40 350 Yellow

Slugthrowers:

 Sniper Porject Impct W2K - 200 1000 Green

 Volley Porject Impct W3K Really, 1 50 1000 Blue

 Discgun Porject Impct W2K - 50 750 Green

Discgun: ammunition for this gun are small razor discs instead of standard bullets. On a roll of 1, the shot goes through the target and hits the next thing behind it.

Malfunction: It jams. If the GM thinks it funny, it also sends a disc into the shooter.

Remedy: A successful specialty roll clears the jam.

Shrapgun: this fires packs of needles into people. Count energy-only armor (like that of most troubleshooters) as only half value, rounded down. Hardened armor has its value doubled against shrapguns.

Malfunction: it explodes like a grenade. HA-HA!

Remedy: if the shooter has tools on hand and rolls a 1 on a specialty roll, he does clear the jam before it explodes.

Sniper rifle: the distance rifle.

Malfunction and remedy: as a normal slugthrower.

Volleygun: this special slugthrower fires its entire ammunition store in a single shot. Count it as a spray attack.

Malfunction: it's gonna explode, dude.

Remedy: get some nice ColdFun for your next clone. He's been through a traumatizing experiance.

I have been tagged for a game by Mom, Destroyer of Dust Bunnies.

The rules:

• Link to the person who tagged you.
• Leave a comment on their blog so that their readers can visit yours.
• Post the rules on your blog.
• Share the seven (7) most famous or infamous people you have met. Or go with the original 7 weird things about yourself. Or with Sandra's change and list your 7 favorite writing websites. Lots of choices!
• Tag 7 random people at the end of your post.
• Include links to their blogs.
• Let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

I have not met anyone to write about yet... so now some weirdness about ME!

• I can understand fluent cat, often causing me to have arguments with my cats, as they know perfect english
  
• my favorite words are "shabada" and "meh"
• I created half a notebook of optional rules for the d20 system, including complete notes on how to safely rip alignments out of D&D
• I have invented 17 kinds of slop, including 6 chili/Zatarans mixes
• I invented the sling rifle (a slingshot that operates like a muzzle loading gun)
• I can effectively stab people with my hat
• My philosophy: we are specks of dust with delusions of being special, we are here because our parent thought it would be cool to have unprotected sex, and the meaning of life is what you want it to be

It's The Best Day Ever!

Today was a really good day. Sure, Mom was all mad and screamy at me in the morning. Yes, there was nothing super fantastical for breakfast other than plain ol' cereal. And it is cold enough outside to freeze any moisture instantly. BUT TODAY WAS FANTASTIC! I don't even really know why. Was it knowing I finally had the Spam song from Monty Python on my MP3? (spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam Spam-Spam! Wonderful Spam!) Was it that I found two boxes of abandoned croutons at lunch today? Was it because I finally was able to print and turn in my spanish story? Did I learn the meaning of Life?? (no, wait, everyone knows it's 42) I don't know. All I know is that today feels really good.

th3 p0w3r 0f chr15t pwns u!

My computer is possessed. Really! The mouse pad is not simply "out of order", it is maliciously thwarting my will! AUGH! PISSED TEEN SMASH!

Seriously, the mouse is trying to drive me insane. Lets say I want to move it to the disc icon to start a game. The smegger then decides, "OH MY GOD! HE IS DOING A PERFECTLY ROUTINE FILE OPENING!!!!! ALL CIRCUITS REVERSE GEARS!!!! MOVEMOVEMOVEMOVE!!"

At this point I am then screaming all sorts of obscenity at my computer, which is now making the mouse move 1 centimeter where it's supposed to go, 3 feet back. Anything I do is like this. Non-stop. Without fail. Half of my favorite games kill me at first level because of this. EVEN SNOOD!

NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I'm seriously at the point of getting my computer exorcised. Anyone with suggestions short of "smash it and get a new one", please comment. (also please remember I'm poor)

Sorry Everybody! :(

I'm really really really really really really sorry I haven't blogged in so long! I'M SORRY!!!!!! :(

Still, today was the first day in a good long while when no one else had something to do on the computer. Mom has been going overtime on her novels (not "books", "novels", for we are artIsts), and Dad has had a website to run and a book to publish ("Meditations On Violence" by Rory Miller. Check it out!), so go figure.

And to be honest, nothing was missed. All that was really special about today was finally posting an entry in here! We spent most of the intervening time watching the Looney Toons and eating cake. Alwell, it was fun!

the Fruits of My Boredom

I watched the Blair Witch Project for the first time yesterday, had a dream about it, got bored, then recorded my dream in graphic novel form. Enjoy!

PAIN!

  Yesterday were my flu shots. It sucked. It hurt. Bleh. But at least it didn't ache like it did all day today! MEEEHHHHH! It was painful to move my left arm at all! Not to mention the left is everyones favorite punching arm. I do most of my arm stuff with the lefty. It's kinda weird, like my left is the super-powerful lifting/crushing arm and my right is the agile but gimpy arm. Still, if I had to choose an arm to lose, it would be the left. Sure, it is el podosro, but it is still the right arm that does all my favorite things, like write and tie knots and pull triggers and stuff. Ever since I saw that one Red Dwarf where Lister looses him arm to the Epidine virus, I've been practicing doing things with only one hand. That hand was usually my right. I can tie knots with only one hand, now! Is that cool or what?!?

This does not ease the pain, though. Isn't it funny how 99.9% of the population complains about a problem before they even consider solving it? Meh... Meh, I say. Meh...

Snow Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today was one of those ever-special, incredibly rare, and ultimately entertaining days of the  year: SNOW DAY!

I didn't even realize that today was even different, all because my freakin' father woke me up at the usual "why the hell am I even up?" in the morning. I do my routine, get upstairs, and see that the Smart One is watching the Terminator. (the first movie, not the new series) I think she is an idiot at this point, because I looked at the clock and saw we only had 10 minutes left. I then get down to watching it with her while I eated breakfast. ("ate" sounds to much like "eight". Who cares if grammar says no these days? IDK, peoples, IDKWGaC) Anyway, I chance a look at my watch and see that it is time to run! We get in a panic, then the Smart One suddenly remembered that today is delayed. HUH!??!!? I wanted to be sure, so we flipped on the news. At first the Smart One confused a list of traffic jams with a line of school delays, but I was there to correct the mistake. We then find that our school WAS delayed, we then went back to watching the Terminator. We then get a call from the district office saying that they actually shut down! YES! YES!!!!!!! YEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So now I'm sitting down here, telling the world about this miracle, while Mom sends me on mission after mission, all in the name of "just because" and "you already did what I was going to tell you to do today." The moral of the story: HA! Washington kids actually get snow on the right days once in a while! HA-HA!

A Story: To the RUINS!

I now play a regular D&D campaign with my sister, so I decided to write what happened as a story. Here goes...

It was a fine afternoon at Burlacs Place, a travelers tavern in Hedge, as a young woman, a half-elf clad in leather armor and bow slung across her back, approached her companions.

"What did you hear, Sabine?" asked the elf woman in chain armor with a shield and bow next to her.

"There's supposed to be some ruins just south of here, but details are unclear. There is either loads of treasure or mere scraps of what previous adventurers didn't want", answered Sabine.

A brown-skinned man in robes looked up from his book of arcane runes. "That's a big or, Sabine. Who did you get this from?"

"Lots of patrons, Niz," retorted Sabine, knowing Nizsamirah hated having his name shortened. "There was no one who looked precise, if that is what you mean."

A large, muscular half-orc with a huge axe across his back leaned forward. "Anything to hack?" he inquired.

"I'm not sure," replied Sabine, "but something nasty has bound to move in." The half-orc leaned back with a smug grin. Harll loves a good fight.

A tall, hansom Nordic man with an incredibly large sword finally spoke. "Are we going or not?"

The elf, Calonna, stood up. "We should go. Thynorr, are you with me?"

"Yes," said the Norse man. "Balder has not shown disproval, and I take that as a good sign."

Harll leaped up, startling the group. "Yay! Fight at last!"

...

"Well, here we are," said Calonna as they walked over where a mighty wall had once stood, eroded by time and wars long over. They walked past a stable, pitch dark within.

Sabine stopped and looked in. "Harll, I can't see down there. Can you use those dark seeing eyes of yours and look down there?"

Harll walked over to her with the rest of the group in tow. "There is a door back there," he stated.

Sabine looked to the others. "Well," she asked, "shall we take a look?"

"I'm in," said Niz as he cast a spell on the rock. The stone then glowed with light. He handed the rock to Thynorr as they went in. They reached the door as Sabine chanced a look around. She then spotted a seven-foot viper, poised to strike. She immediately drew her rapier as Niz prepared a spell. The snake struck Calonna, though it's fangs did not pierce her armor. At this, the others took notice. Niz cast his spell, as a thin blue beam of cold hit the ground near the snake, forming a small ice formation. Calonna stuck with her sword, severing the tip of the tail. Thynorr thrust his greatsword down, pinning the snake to the earth.

The battle over, Niz drew a dagger. "I want to gather spell components," he explained. Thynorr nodded, and turned to the door. He opened it, and spied four creatures. They were small, reptilian humanoids, each with glowing red eyes and a spear. Thynorr turned away as they got up. "Kobolds!" he shouted.

"Clear the door!" Niz shouted as he ran toward the entry, carrying the snakes head. He began a incantation as the head was burned up. It turned into a small ball of fire, which he threw at the kobolds. It stuck its mark, and exploded in a spray of sparks. The blast killed all four, leaving four charred corpses. Harll looked in.

"Aw, I wanted to kill one, you spell throwing jerk!" complained Harll. The rest shrugged as they went in to search the room.

I'm No Superspaz

Today was a lot like yesterday, though less bad. If bad days were salsa, today was mild and yesterday was severe. 

I think what made it bad was my stupid candle holder project in metals. The damn thing won't stay together! I welded the pieces five times, and they fell off five times! AUGH!!!!!!!! AND I HAVE TO DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! GAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (sound of smashing computer)

Other then that, the day was mostly a heightened state of boredom. Not even the "rapidly smack a water bottle around the table" game was fun anymore. I fell asleep during Red Dwarf! Normally only the completely humorless and the kids with ADD can do that! I was so bored I ate three TV dinners to keep myself entertained! Wait... almost all my sentences have ended in exclamation points. I better stop before my typing screams the computers screen off.

My Brain Don't Work

I woke up this morning, and I had that feeling. The kind you get when you just know that today is going to suck. This was confirmed when I hit my funny bone getting down from my loft. When I get upstairs, I found nothing edible, and we were out of milk! That ain't right. Milk is the breakfast life blood, the Force, the thing that turns nasty dog kibble-looking stuff into something I can eat! I ended up making a cake out of jam, peanut butter, and some bread I found. I almost missed the bus taking the garbage out!

When I finally do get to school, I find that the vending machines were out of Vault. Even the magic-voodoo machine. (you know, that one special machine that sometimes gives you two for one?) This almost had me falling asleep in History. The only reason I didn't was because I'm afraid of falling. When you are 9/10's asleep things get exaggerated, so for all phobic purposes I was falling from the top of the school. Metal Shop woke me up good enough, but I was bored anyway, for I was waiting for OB to get the circle-ly thingy I needed cut out until the end of the hour. Lighting stuff on fire only entertains you for so long, you know?

The whole freakin' day went like this! The only real highlights were my insane Drama class and the nachos for lunch!!! AUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND I STILL DON'T HAVE A SCENE PICKED FOR THE DRAMA FINALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

):( angry face

Online At Last!

HI EVERYBODY, I'M BACK! I couldn't do an entry on New Years Eve, but that was only because I was getting my blog online. THIS IS FREAKIN' AWESOME!!!!!!!

It was a weird process. They had limited background choices, so I went with the dotted black one you see now. Then when theold entries were added in, I found that the dark background and the black writing didn't mix well, so now all my writings have to be lightly colored. Then the picture of Mojo had to be altered, because that picture, along with a film canister with catnip in it, is all I have of him.

Anyway, as a first day online goes, this one has me excited! YEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!